Ah First Thursday, Thirst Thursday… nothing beats pretentious conversation at independent art galleries and gallivanting around the streets of Braam, your privileged wine-drunk ass admiring our local arts scene under the lights of Nelson Mandela Bridge.
Here are some of the things you can catch at First Thursday…
Black Turtle Necks
The uniform of the snob. It’s chic and minimal: the perfect piece to complement your massive ego.
People pretending to know what the fuck is going on
By Thursday evening, sometimes you just don’t have the brain space to interpret art. Sometimes you’re not even sure which things in the gallery are the art and which aren’t. But we’ll all find something to say about the afrofuturist short film that makes no fucking sense or how the car guard we mistook for performance art would actually make a brilliant piece.
People Trying to pre-drink for free before the Kitcheners jol
That’s what it’s actually about.
Jocks hanging out on the art mile
I guess they got lost on their way to the Jolly. There may be many of them getting drunk on craft beer in the street but you’ll be safe if you go inside the galleries, where the jock never ventures.
Art/Design students who buy an outfit for this every month
It’s important to maintain social status and be seen looking your best at first Thursday.
Kaylin is not an illustrator. Please do not take these illustrations seriously.